I know i said i was taking a break, but i just need a chat badly.

the mood here in my house is so negative! my dads acting so strange, is all quiet and vacant looking, and looks as though he has been crying. he just gets stressy if i ask him what the matter is. then theres my brother...need i say more!

Im back at work this week too, and people there are negative. all around me is negativity and it is doing me so much damage! i feel like its suffocating me! im the type of person that needs postivity and happiness around me, or being around genuine, deep people (by that i mean people who arent shallow and self-obsessed!) but all it is around me recently is negativity, shallow-ness and unhappiness. i feel like its crushing me and i cant stop it. i wanted to take a break from PsychCentral to try and find out what is wrong, and its not even been a day and i know exactly what the problem is! i just dont know what to do about it! i feel trapped, lost and confused about where i am at the moment, so i cant leave here because this is my lifeline...and led in bed last night i realised that. i was really unhappy last night, and have been today, and still am tonight. i feel like i need to cry but it wont come out. i needed to cry last night, today and especially tonight, but i really cant let go of it!! i feel like a resevoir that is full of water, and the pressure behind my eyes is big, but i just cant release it. i dont feel like eating either, because i have so many emotions to digest, it doesnt feel like there is room for food, if you see what i mean. i havent eaten properly since yesterday, i know i should but i just dont want to. i normally have councilling on tuesday's but my councillor is away this week so i have to wait until next tuesday, but i really need it this week!! im glad i still have this place, and i did want to try and see how i got on without this site but i cant do it yet. not now.

anyone got any kind words of comfort, because i could really do with some right now! thanks in advance.

simon