Thanks, you've all given some great input.

Anne- you are so right, email is definitely not the place for heavy stuff. This has been a lesson for me. I usually communicate best via email and this last email containing the disclosure, really threw me, more than i expected.

Bamapsych- I love the push/pull analogy that is exactly what is going on.

Elliemay- "fear induced aggression" yep this was also going on, i was scared, i took her comment about discussing this in session as a disinterested and polite "i don't want to talk to you unless we are in session" when in reality it was more likely a safety precaution, considering the context of the disclosure. So i became fearful that she was disgusted or angry with me or bored or a million other negative things. So i struck out at her because anger feels better than hurt.