I think i know exactly what you mean. One minute your there and its.fine and the next notings changed but inside your head everytig has and u feel the same pain as you did before and then you tense whih probbly makes it worse.

Im not really sure im over it tbh i just try to really focus like hoq yous focus to shut yourself out but the other way just think breayhe rekax, its fine. I was also really lucky to have a partber who could see/feel it in me and used to stop and help me relax before we carried on. Speak to your partner maybe if theres like sonethig you can do as a hint so he knows yiu need a minute or whatever. Altgough i dont know cayse maybe its better to try to not draw attention to it incase that makes yoou thinkvabout it more. I hope ypu can find whats right fpr ypu!