I just recently in the last two weeks had an increase in my zoloft and my abilify because the treatment Im on for my illness causes major depression and my pdoc is trying to balance it out. So the last three days I have woke up just angry as hell. I mean pissed off at the world. I have to litterally go in my bed and punch pillows and scream into my pillows so that I dont physically hurt others. I had to burn myself with a cigarette to get these feelings to go away if only for a moment. I have never self injured before this but it seemed like the only thing that would work to get my mind off of being so angry.
Its like I have all this nervous angry pent up energy inside, but I cant do anything constructive with it. I have never been this way before is this a disphoric mania? Was my medication raised too much maybe? I called the pdoc office and hes out on vacation until Wednesday. I have nothing to calm these demons inside and I am afraid I am going to hurt someone or myself. I know I sound crazy here. But Im just being totally honest and I know you guys wont judge me. I cant just tell this to anyone else in real life they will think Im a total nut case. I dont know what to do with myself. I dont know if I need to go into the hospital or what? Someone Please help I need feedback if you have any?????