Hi there kyo,

I am....a mess lol, if I am trans I'm suppressing it because I love my relationship with my girlfriend...I would love to hear from another ftm myself.

So this therapist of yours...oye, the more someone tells you to be someone you are not, the more depressed you are going to be. What would it feel like to have a therapist that actually encourages you to explore your thoughts?

When I let myself explore some things, I realized...

-I don't like my boobs, I want to wear a binder (I actually just ordered one online) http://www.lesloveboat.com/shop/index.php?cPath=77

-sometimes I imagine what it would feel like to pee standing up with a prosthetic

well those are the two most stereotypical thoughts maybe, I'm pretty self conscious, waiting for someone to tell me I'm not a man, so I donno.

Oh hey the girl toys-when we are young, toys are just toys, we don't assign gender to things until we are older...my parents still have a pic of me in a tutu that really pisses me the **** off. Yeah kids are so free of any gender bias, a toy is a toy when you're young.

Kyo, I just found out my best friend is ftm, I hate saying that..I have a guy friend that you might be able to talk to you, if you want, and I'll ask her too if he would be willing...cuz he is so cool about talking, especially because he asks you questions that are more "yes you might be trans" then "no, that is not a trans quality. Does that make sense? It might if you talk to this person, who is not on PC.

If nothing else, I can ask you 19million questions and we can explore these things together lol

take care,
obj