Quote:
Originally Posted by autotelica
My thoughts?
Some of us are "feeling" creatures.
And some of us are "thinking" creatures.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling or thinking, or feeling AND thinking.
I would never dare to tell a "feeling" person to stop feeling so much. That's rude, first of all, and secondly, how do you make yourself stop feeling?
Thinking is the same way. I can't make myself stop thinking any more than I can make myself stop breathing.
The thing to avoid is getting stuck. You can get mired in crying jags just as much as you can get stuck in mental loops. The key is doing something different when you find yourself not going anywhere. After all the tears have been shed, what's the plan, Stan? And after you spend hours ruminating and worrying about the worse, do you set aside some time to regroup? Feeling and thinking do not have to be diametrically opposed.
I don't put much stock in advice that makes a big to-do about turning to the "heart". It's alienating to me. There's a big whoosh noise whenever I read stuff like this. And honestly? The constant focus on emotions and feelings make me feel inadequate in my therapeutic journey.
|
Thanks, autotelica.
The text doesn't make much sense to the way I function, either. Besides, it contradicts itself - it seems to say, at the same time, "bottle it up by not talking about it" and "let it out by feeling it". As for "don't try to understand your feelings" - well, when I can start to understand why I feel whatever I may feel,
that is when I can start to get over it. If I'm just flailing around trying to experience the emotions or whatever, I get lost and confused and feel a lot worse. And what's the deal with "don't talk about it"? For me, healing comes through words, and I don't need to be told that my ways of getting better are inferior.
To paraphrase the wise SD: I'm happy if this works for others, but I'm not going to agonise about the fact that it doesn't work for me.