Apav, your suicidal urges are warnings requiring attention. You know you are in the wrong place, yet you are torn as to what to do:
- Let events run their course.
- Act to shape the course of events.
Each involves risks and potential rewards. What's best for
you in the long run? Do you need help deciding? Will you need help to act on whatever decision you make?
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My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.