Quote:
Originally Posted by 5catsin2out
Sometimes it's like I feel most "me" when I feel like a worthless piece of crap.
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Sounds as if "feeling like a worthless piece of crap" may be distracting you from something you'd like even less.
Quote:
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I wonder if I should tell my therapist at all? I guess he wouldn't be supportive now if he wasn't then. ??
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When I've tried doing something that someone else in my life didn't seem to want to support me in, I've usually had better results when I didn't tell them, than when I did.
Worst case: I try it; it doesn't work out, or I don't like it. If the other person knew what I was going to do, they get to say, "Ha! I told you so!" -- and try even harder to talk me out of the next thing I feel like doing (or into the next thing I don't feel like doing).
Best case: I try it and I get a lot out of it. Somewhere way down the line the other person notices that something's different, and I casually mention that oh, yes, I did that thing they didn't think I should bother with...
This is probably just me, but I hesitate to announce even to the most supportive people what I'm planning to do, if I'm still not sure I'm going to go through with it. I want to be free to stick one toe in the water, decide it's not for me, and go to Plan B. If a whole lot of people know I'm going to lose weight or quit smoking
*,
in theory (whose theory is that?) I'm going to keep going
for them even when the going gets uncomfortable. In practice, I soon start to resent the pressure and look for a way out. I may arrange to fail spectacularly, or look for a convincing excuse why I couldn't possibly do what I'd said I was going to do, or take to avoiding my "audience" till they've had a chance to forget.
Sorry if that's TMI, 5in2out. Unhijacking your thread now!
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*Just examples. Neither of these is currently an issue for me. What
am I working on? Tell you some other time!