If you can find the courage to tell your husband about this it would be good and maybe he will understand things better and help you more. If you are afraid of his reaction, just remember that he is married to you and chose to do so, which also means that he loves you. It's scary to open the dark parts of ourselves to other people, even people that we trust, but it's another step in the healing proses. You don't have to fight the battle alone if he is willing to help and support you.