I'm not sure where to post this as it can fit in so many areas. I ave been going through a lot of life lately and I don't know if I am just being a big baby or what. I had a girlfriend for a year and the two of us fought all the time. the last 10 months was just one fight after another. she would always blame me for everything and it seemed nothing I ever did was good enough. she is a wonderful woman but we just weren't meant to be. the more she complained about what I didn't do the more sad and withdrawn I got. I tried to ask her many times to focus on what I am doing and not what I'm not doing. she started assuming I was cheating on her because i had gotten so withdrawn. I'm not gonna get into too much detail about the relationship. anyway. so a few months ago my grandfather died. a couple months after that my puppy died. then a couple months after that my girlfriend and I split up. I haven't been able to talk to her and just when I think I'm starting to get better I foundout she is three months pregnant. I have been bathroom.g in my head for a while now on what my problem is. On one hand I know I am a great nice friendly caring person. on the other I start to wonder if I am this monster she has painted me to be. I understand in fights people say mean things but she constantly belittled me calling me pathetic an a hole sob all that. all of her friends and family hate me. and here I am stuck in the struggle. am I really a monster. should I leave her alone and stay away. she didn't tell me she was pregnant I found out from a family member. I am 100% certain she was faithful in the relationship. if she wasn't working she was with me and visa versa. she wouldn't allow it any other way. I've taken a few online depression test things and they all at severe depression. lately I have been getting anxiety attacks. I just want to break down and cry. sometimes I do. just thinking about it males me well up. I've just got so much built up I don't know how to handle it. I've been seeing a therapist for a few weeks now. I usually feel a little better for a day. then its right back down in the pits. I try to keep the bad thoughts away but they infect my mind and my dreams. I've lost 30 lbs in the last 8 weeks and sleep is hard to find. I just don't know what to do or how to fix things.