apparently everything that i centralize everything that upset or affected me, was nothing more than how things were purposely done and worded, so either the way i was told that and how i interpreted things as retaliation against some person that i do not know them or knew of what they were doing, i guess it was all just some sick way of trying to create sympathy for someone in a very sick and twisted form, or the person is just be made into a punishment, which is still sick and twisted, so i broke down a major barrier that had a huge impact on my life that took my 7 or 8 years to figure out, then there is years before that in a few places, so at least today i see some idiots came up with an idea, that no matter what they do, it ain't ever going to be right, their plan was just to use one thing either or, and they do anything with it there are things that must be admitted, and it's all directed at one person they claim, what would be left if they do anything who knows, who caress, guess they don't