Sorry I wasn't trying to bash your relationship. I was just bashing codependancy. I don't like that the word has become all that it has. My relationship didn't work out because I feed into all the beliefs that codependancy exists. I just wish I had told my husband that I felt insecure when he was so independant. I wish I had asked him to spend more time with me. Truth is I see all relationships as interdependant. I work where everyone has strange personalities. Maybe not strange in their own eyes but we all have qwirks. What is funny is we know each others like the back of our hand. Some we hate but when we really have to pull together on something it is amazing. Down right amazing! Because we know each others strengths and weaknesses we are like superpeople acting in unison together. I accept the fact one lady has bad legs so I do all the leg work, she accepts I can be bored at times so she finds me things to do, we know who can handle certain customers personalities, it all works together. But we depend on knowing each other and being able to depend on this being okay to be who we are. I wish I had been okay with this in my marraige. However, we were too worried about having to maintain our independance. Sorrry if this upset you.