It would all start with the professionals. Go to a psychiatrist and a therapist. The psychiatrist is the one who would diagnose you, so when you see him/her, have your facts ready and let him/her not only hear why you think you have BPD, but let them see what symptoms you have. You might do that by telling them a story from your life that illustrates the symptom you are describing. Like if you are describing black and white thinking, Explain to the psychiatrist (pdoc) how last week you thought that your Aunt Margaret was the greatest woman on the planet. You thought this because she had always been so helpful and kind to the entire family. This week, you think Aunt Margaret is the worst person on the planet because you just found out that she neglected your cousin by not buying him/her name brand cereal as a child. Obviously, this story is false, but have a real one from your life to tell the pdoc, for each symptom.

In terms of depression, uh yeah. If you have BPD, long before you find out you have it, you will much experience with depression. TONS. And yes, finding out you have it can be depressing in and of itself. It is a tough disease to fight and a tough disease to fight. Estimates are that it kills about 13% of us.

It is also hard to live with, because many of us have trouble finding motivation to live. And even when we do, our coping skills are not that great, so our lives are usually of a lower quality than folks without this disease.

We have more trouble establishing relationships and much more trouble maintaining them. We tend to either put folks on a pedastel or beneath out feet. And we can change their position in a matter of minutes. In addition, our own wild mood swings and possessive insecure attitudes can push others away. When they leave us, it is like the end of the world.

Fear of rejection is an overriding factor behind much of our behavior. We do anything and everything to avoid it. And sometimes, we just get fed up with fighting the (as we see it) inevitable coming rejection, and we push the person out of our life before they can leave.

So, BPDers can die from the disease, or they can live and try to fight it, or they can live and allow the disease to determine their everyday life.

Many folks who try to fight it, use various method of treatment. Most use some form of medication and find it helpful, but not all they need. That leaves therapy. There are various types of therapy available. Among those that are largely reported to help are :

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) more info on that can be found :

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Most folks take DBT classes and go to therapy. There are online groups that also offer DBT support and they are peer led.

I will add more types of therapy later. Have to go now. Hope some of this helps. God bless.