Renew, Ephesians 5:33 says" Nevertheless,let each one fo you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband"

I know nothing about codependency..but I do know that God listens and He wants you to enjoy your life.. both of you..and He knows His plan for you.

I say you are on the right track; you are putting Him first How could you go too far wrong? There is no hurry... take your time, keep praying.. i will pray also...

Blessings..ps.. having faults does not mean failure.. those putting you down are clueless...