a) It's unfamiliar.

b) I am "programmed" to feel bad. Also, because of bpd stigma, that same tape goes thru me: "how dare you cope!" and also, "why even try? You are going to fail!" and "bpd, always a bpd".

c) I was not shown how to give myself good feelings.

d) It doesn't feel natural.

did I miss anything? lol

oh, what someone else mentioned: I am *terrified* of being well because that *will* change how others relate to me.

Carol