that makes total sense to me. the more aware you are of ur want to succeed, the more you analyze, and find more and more flaws. so i guess technically, you are making urself lose confidence, because you look and look for flaws, and then when you find them, obsess and obsess.

i would begin by seeking a school counselor, or another type of t. they can help you. it sounds to me like the root of ur problem is anxiety. you are afraid of being alone in the world, so you have to set these high standards for urself to ensure that you do well in life, and then you put all this pressure on top of that. that is not healthy. so yeah, i would begin by getting professional help.