Hi Gretchen,

Welcome.

If I were to announce that I would be glad to be your sponsor, you would actually be able to hear a rolling wave of laughter rounding the earth as the news arrived in each country.

I'm a hot mess, too.

So, it would not be advisable for me to act as a sponsor to you, but I am around if you are ever having an really "sucking the bat" kind of night, and on a rare occasion, a broken bead of wisdom might drop out of my pocket, that may be useful.

I guess I'm trying to say, I get you girl, sucks I don't have the skills your looking for, but in a time of total crisis...

I got your back,

-Fleeing Bellocq