Hi, I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, bi polar, social anxiety, and intermittent explosive disorder... but I'm starting to wonder if I have something else? Like DID or schizophrenia or something.

I'm very confused about my identity, I'm not sure who I am or what I want.. I mean I kind of know, but then sometimes I want different things at different times... but I try to stay focused on what I'm doing now, what I feel like I need and is good for me, goals I've set.. ect. But sometimes I'll react in a way that I think someone else would react.. like say something in the way they would say it and their mannerisms.. ect. But I'll do it as if it was ME saying it and sometimes I don't notice, but I've been catching myself doing a lot lately... and I act like people I find really charming or interesting in some way.. most of the time it's guys I've dated, but not always.... and it's like I act like these people in response to different situations, like sometimes I'll be the "music nerd" and other times.. I'll be "responsible"... it's like I go around and decide to adopt other people traits. It's like some Norman Bates *****!!!

I also have a whole other "delusional world" that's kind of always in the background but I ignore it but all it takes is a trigger and there a certain triggers that make me go psychotic and it's like being in another world where everything is just wrong and I'm so scared and think people want to hurt me. It's like my brain created this whole other delusional world to protect me from rejection/pain.. it made all these associations through experiences.. it's like a chain and my brain has added all these links and it seems like I've avoiding a lot of situations/experiences/people/places because I'm so afraid of triggers and falling into psychosis... I'm afraid to date now, because it seems I go nuts when I get attached (do the black & white, idealization and **** of BPD) and then when I break-up I go psychotic... I'll talk to my ex or someone who reminds me of my ex, I go psychotic. I'm starting to think I'll never be able to love.. I'll never be able to really trust anyone or connect with them... I'm starting to think I'll never be able to be stable enough to have a normal life and I'm just gonna live in fear all the time and will have to go into a group home and I don't want that!!