hi, I didn't read all the responses but I must say that I was in this situation... except on the other side of it. When I was 21 I married a man I didn't love, and we were married for 5 years. It's a long story so I will tell you how it was at the end.

I thought he was really gross physcially. I hated kissing him. He had this smell about him that made me feel sick. It was terrible. I hated him because to me he represented this prison. I didn't want to have sex with him any more, and I told him so and that I didn't love him, so he started forcing me. I would lay on my stomach and cry until he was done. then he would hug me and I would just be blank faced.

We had no real relationship to speak of. We were like roommates but not husband and wife. He used all of my inheritance from my mom to purchase toys for himself and not pay the bills or buy groceries. This was a punishment to me, I guess. I was terrified to leave him because I had no job and he had taken all of my money. I was afraid if he left he would take my child away from me, so I stayed and "tried to work things out." He swore me to secrecy not to tell my family what was happening, so I told people I met online instead.

Then, I started having "crushes" on other guys. I had several in span of 2 years, until I met someone and really fell for real. Only then did I get the courage to announce that I wanted a divorce. He decided that he would let me have the divorce and he would live with me. (I live in a house owned by my dad.) Anyway, I had to threaten to kick him out after 2 months because he wouldn't leave and I was becoming more afraid of him all the time. So finally he did. (If he hadn't I was going to a women's shelter.)

Anyway, he did take my child from me. And left me destitute after taking all of my mom's money. And, I realize it was all my fault because I was foolish and married someone I didn't love to get away from my dad... who also took his side and after the divorce he threw me out into the streets. (That was how I ended up losing my son.)

Anyway, it was horrible. I think I waited for him to end the marriage, but he didn't want to. Instead he just kept going along doing what he was doing. I tried multiple times to introduce him to women I thought he would like so he would go with them and we could just end things. I didn't want to hurt him exactly but i didn't want to be with him. I even had someone tell me I am incapable of love, which isn't true. It was just... the wrong person... and I was wrong for what I did.

So for him to say he wants to see other people but keep the marriage is a cowards way, it's not fair to you. I'm very sorry this happened to you. The answer to the question: "Do I deserve to be with someone that I love that loves me back?" Is a loud, resound, heaven shaking "YES!"

anyway, I know it's a terrible story and all, but I just wanted to share with you and I hope you find peace and love that you deserve.