This is a good example of what is called a limiting belief. As long as your happiness depends on specific circumstances that are outside of your control, then you will only be happy when those conditions are met. Unfortunately it is not enough for someone to tell you that happiness is a choice you are free to make regardless of the situation you find yourself in. You are the one who must identify and challenge your limiting beliefs. The best way anyone else can help is by being an example of someone who is not limited by the same beliefs - someone who shows that it is possible.