_zh I know we don't know each other but I can't help but reply to the pain you have expressed. Since I have joined you have been a continuous source of information and conviction. I am happily surprised to see a glimpse of the person within although it saddens me that it expresses your pain.

i hope that over time you can enjoy the entire spectrum that is you and not lose those weeks/months or whatever length you find yourself missing. All I can say is that my heart goes out to you. I hope that you become able to continue to see your pdoc to help you heal. For what it is worth I am here for you and care.

BTW I have ordered the book you reference in one of your posts "The Myth of Sanity" as I respect your opinions.