I have the same issue, this power struggle between my parents "winning" and me "winning". the truth is, no one really wins in the scenario. You are only hurting urself. I suggest that you get some profression help, because there is something underneath the hurting (something that is bothering you emotionally, etc) and until you find that and solve it, it will be very hard to stop hurting urself like that. I hope that you can find someone that you can confide in who can help you find that underlying issue. Its a tough thing to go through, but it has helped me more than i can even imagine.