Well I had a session with my T today, I had a lot to talk about. I talked about how undecided I have been and I tried so hard to pay attention and see if I could make a choice in this election. I explained how I didn't really care for either candidate and
I was actually proud of myself for making the effort.

I told him that it has been so hard because every News Channel leans one way or the other so it just hard to get past the way they "LEAN" and pick on the candidate they don't Lean to. Ugh.

I am so lucky because my T is an Independant too, I didn't know that before and he told me that it "IS" hard and he too wishes there was an "Independant" News Channel to watch. He also told me that this is an "extra" challenge for me because I am an "Independant" with PTSD. He told me that if I had been a Conservative, a Liberal, or a Democrat I would be able to flourish along with the "LEANING" and feel safer because they have News Channels to go to. The way I am now, and having PTSD is a big challenge because people with PTSD don't like the "lieing" nor do they like to feel "unsafe" so for me it really "IS" a challenge and to try to not let it get me down.

What I really appreciated as well is that he didn't even try to talk me into one candidate or the other or even tell who he liked. He did agree that it is disheartening to have to "fact" check after a debate and know "both" of these men had "untruths" to sort through. And again for someone struggling with PTSD who is trying to figure out which man to choose, that is very difficult because for me especially I have had to deal with some hurtful lies in my life.

Well, the only thing I can say about the debate last night is that I could see that Obama really tried to "rattle" Romney and he didn't rattle. IMO, that is what some other leader would do to try to "gain" or "intimidate" .

Sigh.....however it still didn't help me come up with a choice tbh. I am just worn out and I am just going to see if I have some kind of deciding factor for me and if I can do my duty as an American citizen and pull a lever on Voting day.

I talked to my T about what I have posted here and I also got to talk about something else that has been bothering me that affects my sense of "safety" lately too. It is a situation where I don't like a "lie" and I can't just come right out and say it the way I want to and I am not alone in feeling that. He told me that was a challenge too and there should be a better way I can "tell" and be "heard". I should not have to ever feel like I did when I was a little girl. And he knows I have been doing my best to deal with it.

Well, that is all for today, I am really so very tired right now.

Open Eyes