Hi katieranger,

I'm sorry you are going through so much pain right now. You are not stupid. You have an illness you are trying to work through. It would be nice if we all had happiness switches we could just turn on. Life would be so much easier. With all you have gone through recently, maybe feeling a little numb for awhile will help you heal and find your equilibrium again. Maybe numbness is nature's way to allow a person to recharge when they have gone through an emotional overload. I'm glad you are working with a therapist on these issues and are participating in this site. You are not alone in your struggle and we are here for support.