I was/am in a similar situation. My bf's wife left him for good almost 3 yrs. ago, and he started something with me a few mo. after. I wish I would've known then what I know now. He was hurting very much, and probably missed her. He tried to hide it, and even told me that he didn't care about her when we first started dating. He talked about divorce, and then when he moved in with me /c he was gonna get evicted......all that talk went away. Don't be someone's rebound. Don't be their tissue to cry in, and then throw away. It's not fair to you for her to get to cry on your shoulder, but still be missing her husband. She needs to go to her family or some sort of group for support. You may be able to handle this, but I know that I couldn't. I can't let it go that I'm 2nd choice, and I feel like he's settled for me because he can't be with her anymore. Being the transition partner has really left me in ruins. I know you say you love her, but does she love you? I think it's really unfair when unhealthy people don't finish up their old business and enter into something new with a fairly healthy person. I was becoming very healthy emotionally, and made a huge mistake thinking I could rescue my bf. I can't take it anymore, but I can't leave either. It's really pulling me apart. You should try to be really strong, and let her go for awhile until she figures out her feelings, and what she's going to do about them.