Thank you for all of your replies. It's very comforting that there is someone out there who listens and sympathize with my situation. It made me smile that you all wish me well. I hope everyone is doing great.

I've started looking for a therapist in our city. But I might have to hold off therapy for now. I've got bills piling up that I need to settle immediately. I'm hoping to have my big break soon (or sooner) at my new job, to get my morale boost and maybe a little of my self esteem back.

There's been some good progress with my boyfriend. We had a pretty intense discussion and he was very sorry he didn't realize he was being unsupportive. He thought giving me a pep-talk on helping myself up or telling me to get a better paying job was his way of showing his support.

I reminded him why I fell in love with him, that he was the one who motivated and believed in me when no one else in my family did. He was always proud of what I do.

I told him that sometimes all that I need is a HUG and some comforting words, not a solution to my problems - well at least for the moment. He has been helping me with my rent, food and fare; after our discussion he realized I need more than just the material support.

I'm feeling a little better now that I have you guys to vent out my problems and that I still have someone who is physically here to hold my hand.

I'll update you again soon. Hopefully my next post will be much better news.

Take care everyone!