I've come along way since I was 16 until now.

I use to be argoraphobic, literally a hermit inside my room for almost a year. I lived in my PJ's and slept all the time.

I use to be scared to go outside and go to the store to pick up a simple pack of gum. I use to be scared to walk around the corner to a friends house. My anxiety was high, I was afraid of everything, I use to get panic attacks all the time. I was in an abusive relationship where there was mental, physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse. I was in other situations where I'd be assualted cause I didn't listen to my gut because i'd freeze before I could run.

I use to be too scared to work , peterfied to make a life for myself.

Through therapy and with the helps of medication , friends and family i've been able to work, my anxiety is minmal, I rarely get panic attacks. I can talk myself out of being anxious with postive self talk, and exposure to the fear, thanks you to my psychairtist.. My depression is in remission, My nightmares, and body memories are almost completely gone, cause i've dealt with the tramas that I went through from the ages of 16-21 roughly. I feel empowered now and stronger, I wont let anyone harm me, I don't live in the past past , I don't feel guilt, shame ect.. I do live in regret, because i do regret that what I went through, but I know it wasn't my fault, and I Will never let myself go through that again. I do listen to my gut now with potentally dangerous situations, and I haven't been in one for 3 yrs. I have a wonderful boyfriend of close to 3 yrs that treat me like gold. I can become intimate with him and not be scared, freeze or get triggers. I don't jump at a name or a certain touch. Sure I will likely still get triggers and body memories, but that is a part of healing and I know that now so I will not hide from them, I'll deal with them.

I know that right now i'm not working, but I have worked before and loved work before, that means I know that I will get a job again. I am aloud to be picky and not pick a job that I know I will hate. I have a supportive family, friend, you guys and my man.

I can say now that I am extremely happy, I feel good about me, and i've haven't been able to say that for some time.

Sure i'll have set backs, i'll likely always have depression and anxiety, and my ptsd may come back, it may not, but I can live with that, it no longer controls me, I can control it.

<font color=red>~Sundance~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>