Hi Broken Angel!
I want to give you hope. It's not impossible to overcome and it is really hard to do on your own. It's not easy. I too used to be a writer and I don't write much any more. I used to have wonderful creative periods with mania, but now I have dysphoric mania and I don't get that anymore.

It is very frustrating and I also miss it so much.
I also know how it is to go along alone. I always have to take care of eveyrthing on my own.

It's hard and lonely. I usualy don't have a doctor or medicine or anything either, trying to get some now and it's hard.
But people with bipolar are also incredibly intelligant. So don't think you won't have a brilliant life. Don't give up hope. Famous writers, poets, and actors all have bipolar. Like Emily Dickenson and Catherine Zeta-Jones are two. There are politicians and scientists and doctors. Here on this forum there are people who have earned their doctorate degrees. It's not impossible.
I'm glad you've joined the forum. Having support here has helped me a lot! I hope we can help you, too.