Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne2.0
When people say feelings are facts, this is the kind of thing they are referring to. Your feelings are your own, and it is fine to feel however you feel.
But telling people that they MAKE you feel a certain way is a very destructive way to communicate to other people, and is either designed or has the effect of pushing them away-- usually when they are trying to help.
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I'm totally cool with pushing them away and wish they'd stay off my threads. Nothing they said was helpful.
But I do hear what you're saying about destructive communication. Maybe I can rephrase.
When you say/do ________________, I feel like ___________.
Is that better? I learned "I feel" statements in a group once.
I feel bad enough on my own. I came here for support, but instead I FEEL attacked. Maybe I'm wrong to FEEL attacked, but I do. All I have to work with are my feelings, and this board is now producing bad feelings instead of good ones. I'm already fighting self harm impulses, and I don't need any extra negative input.