(((Miles)))

I can understand how frustrated and confused you are feeling right now. It sounded like she wasn't very happy or fulfilled at all by her husband. It makes sense, for your perspective, that her staying with you is a no-brainer. She's actually happy with you and she's able to do & be so much more!

The trick comes in with with her sons. I don't know how old her sons are, but things get tricky once kids are involved. You may live in an area that is far from their school ~ which would require switching schools, and a bunch of mumbo jumbo that can be a little traumatic. And that's on top of the fact that their father wasn't being a regular part of their lives. That's very traumatic. In my experience, kids need stability! I hope that they're now getting some help in therapy, to help them work through their confusion, guilt, resentment, and other emotions they may have towards things.

Your gf is a mom. First and foremost. She's probably got a lot of feelings that she's battling about leaving her hub, and how that may have affected her sons. Equaling guilt. I would advise you to let her make her own decision about what she wants to do. Maybe she will decide to stay with you and seek a divorce with split custody (or full-custody, w/ some visitations, if he's ever been abusive with the boys). But, she is an adult. She's a mother. Your gf has a right to do what's best for her and her boys.

Maybe that does include you. You need to be your ultimate #1 in the end. You have to hold your head up, restrain your ego a bit, and let your gf decide what's right for her to do. I wish you both the very best. Take care!