You should add writing to your list of good things you can do. I as well could relate to a lot of what you were saying, and with my compultions and hyperactivity OCD never came up. What I have been told is that even self diagnosed aspies and clinically diagnosed either way you can still try to make changes in your life to help cope with stuff. I often too laugh at inappropriate times and feel the need to look at others to try to understtand what I should be feeling...and still I lack emotional identificatio, empathy, and aren't the highest in the social skills area. If a diagnosis will make you feel at peace, and gives you more hope and understanding..maybe its worth bringing up to your doctor. I like that you shared, sometimes talking but stuff can be really difficult, I give props. Stay strong..my therapist says "people are as norm as norm is...so what's normal?" When I feel isolated or detached, which I think is a common symptom. Good luck! Stay strong