Yesterday was draining, from the two severe panic attks, plus preceding events. Didn't stop me from being anxious/intrusive thoughts, etc. I wanted so much not to be alone. Times like that I wish someone could stay with me 24/7, and be a beacon of sorts to remind me this will pass. Because even after the dozens upon dozens of times i've experienced this, I always forget it will pass. It is so acute, and floods my entire brain/body---it's devastating.

I was finally able to use my sleep mask again last night, and much of today. My sleep has been off schedule, but still fighting the infection, I've just rested a lot anyway. I slept a lot today, and am still quite tired. PMS abounds, so I'm trying to remind myself that's what a lot of it is. My legs are already starting to hurt.
The anxiety has gone off somewhere for now, and I'm not quite depressed, just sort of, perplexed that today I'm laughing some, feeling more like me, (though still dizzy from the wonderful inner ear fluid.) Stupid ****ing Bipolar/anxiety combo; myself literally gets lost in the middle. Then when I recognize "me" again, I'm surprised and kind of observe it in a way.

I'm going to go ahead and address this, as I did create this thread. Anyone who wants to convince me of alternative thoughts/convictions, etc., please read the end of my first post. I refuse to debate ppl over what I choose to post about how I feel; it's pointless and won't change anything. I don't appreciate anonymous ppl coming along and trying to tell me what's what. I don't live in anyone else's skin, and vice versa; it's arrogant, projecting, and frankly, unsolicited. Thank you.