Part of it is developing perspective. Someone might do something really hurtful to you and you think they are a horrible person. But then you learn more about their full motivations, and what (if anything) you brought into the situation, and it shifts how you see the person. So that might be part of it. And the other part might be that you really wanted/needed a certain response from your therapist, and that's why you had to portray them a certain way... if you got that need met, you might be able to see the situation more clearly.

Keep searching for authenticity... it's hard work.