If you are continuing to hurt yourself, then you are getting something out of that. Carefully think about what happens before you want to do it, what you are thinking, and what you are feeling, and then think through to what happens after (including thoughts and feelings). If you can find what changes, this can help you to understand what it is that you need that you don't know other ways to get. You are needing something, otherwise you would not have any reason for doing what you are doing, and we always have a reason for what we do - we just might not understand what it is. When you can figure that out, then you can find ways that work better for you to get your needs met, without the drawbacks of what you are doing now.

It might be hard to think through this by yourself - you might find it helpful to talk it through with your therapist instead so that you can get some insight and support. Also, it can be hard not to judge yourself, and it is very important to be nonjudgmental, and not to beat yourself up emotionally - that won't get you anywhere. Everything that you do can make sense if you detach yourself from the emotions and judgments about it, and just observe. You don't have to stay lost.