Wow, that's deep and exactly how I feel about this (only been diagnosed in Jan) and then in serious denial. I've come to terms with it and embrace it daily owning it because it is mine! The most important thing for me is I am not Bi Polar I am Chihuahua living with Bi Polar and although it has changed who I am, I am still in control. (okay sometimes not) but everyday is learning experience and I wouldn't want it any other way.