To vaguely introduce the situation, I am in my thirties and have type 1 bipolar (If I remember correctly), but it was the car accident that landed me in the hospital for months, that granted me with the title of “Traumatic Brain Injury.” The doctors have now said, that because of it accident my bipolar has worsened. Now things are going to stay bleaker? However, I always looked forward to my highs, I might get too deep into something or get obsessed but at least there was no mental pain. Now, the brain injury has changed my highs so that I can not focus long enough to get happy about something. So, it is a down spiral all the time. When there is no hope for the storm to lift up, why hopefully wait?