I've had the rage problem all my life, long before I was ever diagnosed with BP. I've slammed TV dinners up against the wall, thrown things across the room, even punched a refrigerator. I'd scream at my husband and/or kids until it felt like my eyes would pop out of my head. I've peeled out of the driveway with tires squealing and turned corners on two wheels.

I've never attacked people physically, though. Well, there was that one kid in the fifth grade who kept punching me and giving me a dead arm every day at school, until one day when I finally hauled off and let him have it. Knocked his lights out, too. Guess what, he never messed with me again. But that's the only time I've ever actually hit somebody, although I've certainly considered it, and once was ready to brain a guy with my garden shovel for threatening to beat up my hubby.

I really scared that dude, he was all "Lady, don't use that thing, my beef is with HIM, not you!!" At the time, I was 20-something years old, two months pregnant and hormonal as hell (didn't have a clue about the bipolar then), and he decided that did NOT wanna mess with a crazy woman, no matter how pissed he was at her dearly beloved. That was a good decision on his part; I don't honestly know what I'd have done if he hadn't backed off.....I think I was psychotic then and just didn't give a crap about the possible consequences of assaulting someone with a weapon, even if it was only a shovel.