It finally sank in a few months ago that it didn't matter if I resented having to take meds to be 'normal', I still had to take them because I'm a hot mess if I don't. One day I was sort of bragging to my pdoc about how "good" I was being about taking my meds, when he pointed to his foot and said "You know where this will go if you don't take them, right?" (Yes, he likes to tease, but I give as good as I get, haha!)

All joking aside, I'm actually very proud of myself for being 100% med compliant. There are times when I'm tempted to see if I'm "cured" and can get on with my life without meds, but it's bitten me in the @$$ too many times before, and I'm now sufficiently scared of going back to where I was the past couple of years that I don't want to start all over again when everything goes down the dumper.