I am so sorry you are going through this. You need support right now and it sounds like the person one could normally turn to, your spouse, is not able to provide that. (I know that totally doesn't help) I just wanted you to know that your post got read, and I am sorry that this is the time of year that things happened at your job. I wish I had something completely awesome to say, but I don't. I just hope that you can hold on to those 'nuggets' and hopefully they can serve you...
and I think you did just fine expressing your thoughts/feelings (if ok)