Appreciate all the responses and the thanks for our sons service. I was a military dependent and fortunate to have lived in Bangkok at the height of the Vietnam War (Tet Offensive). My father was a Korean and Vietnam Vet. My oldest son is on his third deployment, 2 in Iraq, at 29. He turned 19 on his first deployment and grew and 1 1/2". My second son is a Naval Officer on the Stennis currently deployed in the Persian Gulf. I have been around the military all my life.

I certainly understand both positions. I do understand my wife's position as she only has one first son. Fortunately for me, while my parents were alive, my wife was always trying to balance our time between mine and her families. She had a close relationship with my mother and wishes she'd get the same opportunity. She would have "shared" at such an event. All that said, I can still hear my Mother saying "wife comes first".

Bottom line, I don't want my son in the middle.