Lornalady, please try to be a bit easier on yourself - you're just getting a bit of help so you can get your feet back under you so you can get back to being who you are when you're not ill with depression and anxiety. It's an illness, not a sign of weakness - that's hard to believe when you're beating yourself up inside, but it's something that can be treated successfully. Yes, it takes time. But keep doing your part. I know it's uncomfortable to be the messenger between the physician and the therapist, but it's your role because of confidentiality stuff. I always approach it as: "My therapist told me I should tell you about how I ..." and "My doctor suggested that I ask you about ..." You have to advocate for yourself so the folks who are helping you can determine how they should proceed to get you the most effective treatment. You're doing a great job of keeping up with your appointments even though it's frustrating.