Just a random rant.

I am home today, in the midst of another Noreaster storm in NYC when we are just recovering from the hurricane. There are many other people out there who have no heat or power in this freezing rain/snow storm.

Yet here I am. Angry. Angry at the world. Angry at my boss. Angry at my life. Angry at God for sending another dam storm our way.

I told my boss not to pay me last week as an act of kindness because there was no power even though he was bothering me and I was working at home. And I wasted gas going to the office one day last week. I thought this was a hint to leave me the hell alone because I want to leave the office and leave work there. This bringing work home with me is not helping my bipolar especially when I just want to relax and come home.

And I am angry because I do have bipolar and I went back to school and found a job and started working so I could come off disability. There are so many people that live off the system that dont suffer as much as we do and we kill ourselves to go out there and make a living. Why do we do this? Why do we bother?

I am just wondering, just to make myself feel better I guess if others feel that we are just being selfish with our problems when there are others out there that have it much worse than us. Others suffering, others being abused, others who are in more pain. Should we feel guilty for whining so much like I am?