Aww, hon. That sounds awful. I'm so sorry. I hope you're feeling better.

It sounds like you know a lot about the condition. Is there a reason why you feel like you "can't have another attack?" Is it just so painful that you hate having it happen? Some things I've read say that trying to fight it off, or having thoughts about not being able to stand it, are things that make it worse. My anxiety attacks happen for different reasons, so I'm not sure if that's helpful for you in your situation. I hope you have a therapist or someone you can talk to about techniques for working through it.

Most men understand the concept of taking time to cool off. They are more prone than women to having their thoughts shut down or flooded by strong emotions. If someone bothers them during this time, they get more and more upset. If they are left alone, they cool off and then later they can discuss what happened (if they decide to).

If you explain in those terms, maybe he can understand that during an attack you are not able to figure out exactly what is happening or what triggered it. The emotions just drown things out.

I have a system where I can hang a red tag on the bedroom door if I'm at an emotional extreme, and my husband knows that at those times I am completely off limits. After a few times of having him respect my boundaries, now I barely ever have to withdraw that way; when I do, it is only for a short time, and then I can come out and talk to him. I always hold up my end of the bargain by discussing the situation afterwards. If he keeps at me when I'm in certain emotional states, I completely flip out and we get nowhere.

It sounds like your bf's behavior (pinning you down, refusing your requests to be alone, demanding answers while you are suffering) is justifiably setting off some red flags for you. If he is otherwise a non-violent person and you have a good relationship, I hope you can communicate that those actions are not acceptable to you and that they are not helping the situation.

Maybe he'll never want to learn the science behind the condition; some people are that way. It's frustrating when your partner doesn't really understand, but it doesn't mean he doesn't care. But your bf must hear you when you say no, stop, and leave me alone. He doesn't have a right to pin you down, even if he thinks he is helping.

I'm sorry if I'm misunderstanding your post and he was not really doing anything physical; the description sounds really scary. Again, I hope you're feeling better today and you were able to figure out what upset you in the first place. Safe hugs to you.