Hi Tanya,
I think in the right context-some rape scenes are neccessary to the story,as long as they're not too graphic or glamourized to look like rape is sexy and a woman who's being raped is disirable. I've seen a couple of movies like that and it was obviously done for the men who get off on those kinds of scenes and not for the storyline of the movie.
But even when it's neccessary for the movie and it's done in good taste-it's still extremely upsetting. But I think it can be a powerful tool though too because it can show the ugliness and horror of rape. By that I mean-I watched a movie with my brother and it had an appropriate rape scene in it that was done in good taste but was also very powerful. As we watched it together-I was sitting next to him on the couch and I felt my brother's body tense up and get stiff while it was showing. I knew it really upset him and I felt a consolation in that. So, I think it can really let a man know just how horrifying it is for a woman to be raped. I mean, my brother knew rape is a bad thing but I think when he watches a rape scene well done like that, he can really feel the trauma and hate of it.
I hope this doesn't offend anyone.