I know exactly how you feel, through out my life there have been issues which were really unpleasant, but at the same time I coudnt seem to do anything about them! they were outwith my control, and I wonder if that is why I have shut down my emotions as a form of protection, but unfortunately i now feel completely locked in to my own shell and I cant get out, I am seeing a counsellor but not sure if really any help, but it wouldnt do any harm for you to speak to a professional about it, I dont know about you but sometimes I feel inhuman, good luck