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Old Nov 09, 2012, 06:31 PM
anonymous112713
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Quote:
Originally Posted by murray View Post
Part of the reason that I don't drink or do drugs is that I am terrified to lose control- that leads to being vulnerable and danger. Over the years working with T I have begun to let down my guard and I find that at times I can't control my emotions. Although it terrifies me, the connection with T has allowed me to accept that it is safe within his office to let go and cry if I need to or say what needs to be said. It is very hard and I often send apologetic emails after any session where I let the control slip and emotions come out (he of course, tells me that I don't need to apologize but I feel the need).
I hear this alot from control people, no drinking etc. You can almost tell just from reading peoples posts... interesting huh?

I think that's the key....do the hard part, learn , in session and with T, we shouldn't control our emotions, instead just learn to deal with them , accept them and not have guilt or shame and turn that into anger and hatred toward ourselves.... T is like a giant dress rehearsal for life.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ike McCaslin View Post
I'm very attached to my PDOC and not attached at all to my T. I try to maintain control with both.

What's PDOC got that T doesn't?

Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow8 View Post
I have total control over the ability to cry or not cry in therapy though I wish I didn't.

Otherwise, I feel out-of-control somewhat. Are you saying being out of control is negative or positive? That's confusing to me. It has a negative connotation but you, lola, are talking about being vulnerable in therapy and that is a good quality, so we can get the help we need.

I used to always want to able to "let go" in therapy, withOUT losing control.

Anyway, letting go makes me feel more connected to my T.
I would say having control over crying is control unless we are talking about crocodile tears for manipulation?

Thank you for saying it better then I, I think the control I speak of is tied to the ability to ALLOW your self to be vulnerable, we control that. I don't think true connection is possible without "letting go", allowing vulnerablility, at least occasionally in session with T. And if true connection with T is a means of learning, in session and eventually in life, its ok to experience our emotions and not control them but learn to deal with them... then in this case I would say its a bad thing..... its the least that ties us to the stake in the ground of the past.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Goingtogetthere View Post
I've tried it out. And it works for me. LOL! My therapist does not stop my therapy. I tell her when I'm through. So, I do believe I'm in control and connected to my therapist.
Seriously...no time limit....can I get her number? LOL

Thank you all for your input...my head is spinning, I love conversations like this...they are so helpful to me
Hugs from:
murray, ~EnlightenMe~