Momma
You have such an overflowing plate. I am sorry that you world is revolving around your daughter right now. I can certainly see where its not fair to anyone in the family. If I remember right you have some people visiting your home to help with therapy etc. Maybe your daughter needs an increase in meds or maybe a new med?
I know its hard to determine whether her behavior is illness or attention seeking ? Her age is also a factor I am sure, gotta love hormones... Not!
I hope things settle down for you. You so need and deserve a break.
Sending lots of positive thoughts your way