Dear FM,

I think we had another great session today. We talked about all my little successes this week. Only they weren't little to me (and you) they were big! I can now hold on - to the good things without being a perfect mess. I don't have to be perfect. I can throw that old nasty mom message away. "You're a piece of crap if your not a perfect daughter, sister, student ( 98% on a final is not good enough), wife, stepmother, mother, and Mama's list goes on. I feel free! I feel free of her shame and pain. In the past, whenever I thought I'd met her standards, she would move the damn bar. Yeah, I know it was crazy making. Thanks for always telling me I'm not crazy, and helping me to throw away that crappy message. I just hope it doesn't rear its ugly head again, and if it does we can deal with it. Your Gestalt scenario was pure genius in my book. You said it was your responsibility to get us through this and to trust you, trust the process, and I did. Thanks. I truly believe your skills have helped set me free, and that's what helped me do a little more - live my real life - this week, the way I want. I felt so proud of myself today when I saw the big smile upon your countenance. You made me feel accepted, safe, valued and worthy. The needs I have searched for all my life, I am now getting from you, until I can fill myself up, and be off on my own. Well, not really on my own - safe enough to trust and discern more of the world, and not needing to run and hibernate, because I'm not perfect. This week I was able to feel proud of me - GTGT - when you weren't there. Progress!

You always make me feel loved, and have helped me feel loved by others for the very first time. I am no longer running from the unconditional love of my three siblings or my friends. I am worthy.

My audio tape messed up today, and did not record our session. It doesn't even bother me, because I am now able to FEEL and HOLD the love and comfort in my physical body - My Heart - Wow!

Love you lots, FM.

GTGT

PS: Thanks for reading chapter 2 of Anne's memoir. I fell a sleep a few times, so if you don't see this post, I will email you, or just tell you, the next time to read it again.