Cigarette smoking is notorious for being among the most difficult addictions to break--so don't waste time beating up on yourself!

Some studies (I think I remember this right) say it's easier to stop using crack cocaine than cigarettes.

A powerful, personal motivation for stopping worked for me: My dad had Alzheimer's, & his doctor said I couldn't have him live with me as long as I smoked. He had respiratory and heart problems and no, my smoking outside wasn't good enough--there'd be smoke on my clothes and on me. Either I quit smoking or my dad went to an Alzheimer's unit.

You'd have to know our family's dynamics to understand the rock and hard place I was between. My mom had just died suddenly in Florida, my dad had been with her for 62 yrs, I lived in California & am the only child. Stick him in a "home" & go back to my life?

It was easier to quit smoking.

Otherwise, I had expected to die a smoker--& die from smoking, probably. But I couldn't imagine how I could quit. It had too strong a hold ... much stronger than alcohol, which took in-patient rehab and AA to get me off of.

That you're really trying to stop is wonderful. Keep trying. Find powerful motivators. Use this place, they people here who have quit and are trying to.
* hugs galore *

Roadie