ive been talking to my therapist about this. i told her all of my life, my friendships have been unstable and very one sided. they still blame me for the kind of parents i had and they were nowhere to be found when i had an issue, but i had to be there for them. how is that fair?

2 yrs ago, i said to myself i am so disappointed in people. it just makes me really hard to speak/be open to people. nobody knows who i am because i have been told once i tell them what i am all about that i am an "embarrassment" because i am not the "ideal child" or "ideal friend."

the prob for me with making new friends is they all have kids in the 20s age group and i am not a family type of person. all my life i felt abandon, rejected, etc i asked my bf when is this gonna stop? my therapist knows my own parents didnt want us so what do i have to live for?